The X Factor Live Shows - Week Six

Wow! Sorry this is late but I've been a little busy in real life. But WOW! The X Factor saw a lot of drama last weekend. After Frankie left in shame it was up to us - the public - to vote back in one of our previously booted off folk. 

The show began about 12 minutes or so later than scheduled, due to power issues at BT Tower. Fair enough - the show must go on and all that... 

But it's odd, then, that the result of who would return to the show was posted on the X Factor website about 12 minutes or so before the show announced the result. No problem, if the show was recorded and shown on a slight delay, sure. But what of all the people voting up until the closing time for a returnee? 

Whatever. Quite-Hot Amelia-Lily was our favourite and rejoined The X Factor with a dazzling performance at the end of Saturday night's show. She's now bustled herself into my Favourite Three To Reach The Final, along with Marcus and either LittleMix (I hope) or Craig Colton (I think).

But it wasn't all about Amelia-Lily's return! Last week we also lost the one person I believe had been improving vastly week on week; Kitty Brucknell - which was a shame.

Sunday night saw Lady Gaga and some schoolboys performing. Gaga, particularly, was sad to see Kitty go. Running out on the stage as the result was announced, Gaga hugged Kitty - who she is said to have "taken a shine to" - and comforted her, but not before Kitty showed Misha B and the judges how Born This Way should be sung. Taking the mic from Dermot and launching into an acapella version of Gaga's hit Kitty wowed the audience and proved herself to be a stayer in the British music industry. We shall see her again, you mark my words.

It was a good week! But all of a sudden the show feels chaotic and unpredictable. Kitty and Misha B in the bottom two? Arguably the finest performances of the night. Next week is Movie Week and that is always my favourite. I like trying to guess what movie the song is from. I shall look forward to it. 

I'm backing LittleMix to win, but think it will probably be Marcus or Craig. However, Amelia-Lily has really shown that she should have been here all along and is now fresh in the minds of the voting public. Those getting bored or Craig's warbling or Marcus' jigging about, or LittleMix's consistent and exciting performances (wink) may slide their vote over to Amelia! She could win. She could. We'll see.

Frankie Booted Off The X Factor

So Frankie is out of there! After allegedly boasting about cocaine-fuelled sex sessions and weeks of bad behaviour, he has been asked to leave the show. It was only a matter of time, I suppose. 

So what happens now? Well, one rumour floating about is that The Risk are to return, but this is more than likely a joke about their seemingly infinite number of lives. Another is that a selection of ex-contestants from this series will be "put to the vote" and the most popular will return. Yet another is that nothing will happen and nobody will go this coming weekend. That would, however, mess up the Sunday night results show, leaving show-makers with even more dead air to pad out. Maybe they could still do that thing where they read out who's staying in the competition, still take twenty minutes to do so, but just read everyone's names out. 

Or how about this: Get them all to sing a song of their choice, then put each performance online available for download, as normal. But this time, whoever gets the most downloads is immune from elimination next week. Or something like that. 

One last question: despite him being a bollo role-model, how long do you think it will be before some group of arseholes launch a "Frankie For Xmas No1" campaign? Sigh.

The X Factor Live Shows - Week Five

Straight in to my Top Three this week - Marcus takes the top spot with his rendition of the cleverest choice of the week, Reet Petite - VERY classic. And he was wonderful. Followed closely by the ever-reliable Misha B in second place singing and looking like Tina Turner while singing her TT song Proud Mary. 

But this week's third place goes to Craig Colton who, despite being very good, is really boring. Yes, he's a wonderful singer, he's always got a smile on his face, he's very popular in the house - but I think he's boring.

Here he is, look. Looking a bit like a Miami Vampire. "Oh, he's a bit fat and probably gay, he's smiley and scouse... He's SO funny". Um. No he isn't! He has made maybe one or two jokes the whole series long and is riding a wave of Adele-like warbling hype, probably all the way to the final. I loved him to begin with, but now he's boring me a lot. Sorry Craig. I'd rather spend my hard-earned honk on an album by a pratdigger like Frankie Coca-Cola than on your poor-man's-Adele-tribute-album. Harsh, maybe. But it's true.

I was going to talk about how many adverts there always are during The X Factor but I loved that X Factor M&S advert so much this weekend that now I can't bring myself to assault the world of advertising in any way*. And this week, I've finally grown to love Kitty! Which IS confusing and means I can't write what I planned to write about her either.

So let's look forward to next week instead. Now we've lost The Risk and Johnny Robinson there are almost only "purely talented people" left (even Frankie has a following - this is The X Factor, not Pop Idol, remember!). It's going to be really difficult from here on in to choose who to kick out and who to keep. It really will have to be based on their performance that particular week. But then, everyone has bad weeks which, the following week, they have recovered from totally and are seen to be 100% back on form, so that wouldn't really be very fair. 

And next week our seven remaining contestants are rumoured to be taking on the songs of Lady Gaga (which should suit Kitty, since that's her job, isn't it? Sing Gaga, Britney and Madona songs?), which started a marvellous game of "who'll sing what?" in our house.

So, for your consideration, here are what me and @tlchimera think each contestant should sing:

• Kitty Brucknell should sing Edge Of Glory
• Frankie Coca-Cola should sing Bad Romance (this arrangement)
• LittleMix should sing Just Dance
• Craig Colton should sing Speechless
• Janet Devlin should sing Paparazzi
• Marcus Collins should sing Dance In The Dark
• Misha B should sing Pokerface

NEXT WEEK: We'll see if we were right about the above, Why I think there should be no "Themed Weeks" at all and... you know what? I probably won't talk about what I plan to talk about, so what's the point. Thanks for reading :)

* This Is Sarcasm