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Tuesday, 7 June 2011


So that's it folks! If you believe the press then our favourite show is no more. Yes, according to the Daily Bullshit, all the cast and crew of Doctor Who have died in a fire caused by Steven Moffat's inability to control budget and keep his staff happy. The BBC have said, secretly, using unnamed sources who are leaking this info to fan-sites and some other well-known Doctor Who-hating publications, that it now won't touch the series with a shitty stick. And you all believe it. The internet has exploded. Yes, I'm being flippant, yes I'm making this opening paragraph up. But it may as well be what's happening for all the sense anyone seems to be making over this "announcement"!

Here are the pieces that have come together, through the spiteful speculation of many, to create the usual "Doctor Who is in trouble" nonsense. It may all turn out to be true, but let's look at it sensibly for a second. 

Firstly, Arthur Darvill and Karen Gillan seem to be committed to other projects for the foreseeable future... Clearly this means that they are no longer requires as the show is no more. OR. Maybe it means, since their characters have had a pretty good shot at being companions now (no new-Who companion has lasted more than two series remember) and have done very well in doing so, that Amy and Rory are to leave the TARDIS at the end of series six. Which is more likely? They've been married, had a child, lost a child, died, been revived, lose the Universe, found it again... Honestly, is it not time for them to go now anyway? I mean, I know we like them - but seriously. Let's look at it in a positive light? New companions!!! Maybe!!! Probably!!!

Next up: Matt Smith is going to LA to look for work! OOOOH!!! That must mean that he's been sacked, since the show is no more!!! OR. If you read the interview in The Mirror where he mentions this LA thing you'll see that he says - and I'm paraphrasing - "I'd love to go to LA and do film work, but I've got a Universe to save first!" He's stated many places that he has no intention of hanging up his bow tie just yet. And if he does, then it'll be a regeneration (it happens) and we'll move on! But "the BBC needs to come clean, sort out the questions over Matt Smith’s future and stop keeping us in the dark" says Who fan-mag Kasterborous, and what? Ruin a possible surprise regeneration? That would be the next BIG WHO STORY - 'BBC RUIN REGENERATION AGAIN!' Matt will leave when he either wants to leave or the story calls for him to leave. He seems comfortable enough where he is right now, so he says himself, in lots of places.

So without a cast, we need to shake the crew! I know, let's revive rumours about in-fighting between production staff! Boring. And in the past. Not relevant. Who cares if certain people didn't get on with their workmates? It's hardly newsworthy, is it?

'But what about that split in the series? Why's it a two part series? CLEARLY it's all about bad budget management?' Maybe - but unlikely. I don't think so, personally. Maybe it's because the story is big? Maybe it's because the schedule was tight so it offers more post-production time? It's no crime... It seems that people WANT to popularise the idea that the show is heading for the scrap heap. 

How about this? Maybe it's BECAUSE the series has ended, taken its mid-series break, that these rumours are becoming news again? Maybe we're all just very, very bored? Maybe the media is using the BBC's flagship show as another means of creating dissent in the ranks? Or at least making it look that way...

Maybe it's just me, but I'm bored of reading about how the show is never coming back - and if it is it'll be as Doctor Who Lite - every time the series leaves the airwaves. Until this time the show is praised and worshipped in reviews and the AI scores seem to justify this! But as soon as there is no Who then all hell breaks loose and people panic. 

The in-fighting in the production team rumour is old. Very old. Remember when Beth Willis was fired? No, nor do I, because it never fucking happened - despite reports all over, from those apparently in the know, about it actually being the case. I just wish people would take all rumours that are unsubstantiated gossip and nothing more - you can't even call it speculation, since it's not being speculated about, simply repeated ad nauseum. It seems these days that people would be happier knowing if the BBC gave us all a letter through the post, listing just what will happen in the next series, who will star in it and exactly who likes who and who doesn't on the production staff. At least that way we have facts, right guys? RIGHT? Piss off. The show has been running forever, for most of us. If it knocks out a couple of specials instead of a full series every few years then so what? At least it's on. And it would seem that a 7th series has been announced anyway, starring Matt Smith. You're all worrying over nothing.

Yes. I know. I'm boring. I'm rambling. To be honest I wish I'd never started writing this. But I'm having a shit day and it seemed just the right way to vent. Thanks for reading my garbled, jumbled mess of a post (if you've managed to get this far). Now I'm going to cry in a corner.


"14 eps + Matt DEFINITELY. I've got a plan and I'm NOT TELLING YOU WHAT IT IS. Now hush or River shoots you with her Spoiler Gun. #formaqueue"